Also, it turns out that the 2014 Games will be held in a Russian city that no American--with the possible exception of Sarah Palin--had heard of before last Saturday. I'm not talking about the traditional, race-through-a-bar, talk-for-five-minutes-then-switch-partners routine.
Lastly, I would really like to make Bob Costas uncomfortable. In fact, it might more suitably be called Dating on Speed--but I know the OOC is sensitive to a drug joke.
Evan Lyscacek: There's any connection with a field that involves being competitive in a high-performance lifestyle.
The object, though, is completely different: rather than simply finding a good match, the goal is to run through all five stages of a normal relationship, say one that would reasonably last one to two years, in approximately one to two weeks.
Note to potential competitors: it is not advisable that you choose a partner with whom you have actual romantic potential.
First of all, let's face it: this year's Winter Olympics were a letdown before they even began.
NBC did more to hype last week's episode of "The Office" than the Opening Ceremonies.
Also, there is minimal risk of physical injury or sequined lycra.
Evan Lysacek had a stellar competitive figure-skating career, capping it with a 2010 Winter Olympics gold-medal-winning performance in men's singles. I'm usually up at this hour because I commute from Manhattan to Connecticut. and training there, but I do have a condo downtown so I try to get to [the area] as much as possible, and my parents live there.
Probably, your partner has never seen anyone so beautiful and you had him at steak tartare. You must also start to discuss your long-term future together.
This is where you quickly go through the "Disillusionment" stage and power into "Stability." Maybe you can start bickering about what breed of dog you are going to get or how you will get along with each other's more eccentric relatives. (Again, Grandma.) Once you've recovered from this first small argument you must move into a quick "Power Struggle" and, then, briefly, "Commitment." Soon after you enter this last stage, one person must freak out.
But now, the tricky part: condensing an entire relationship into fourteen days or less. A bar is best anyhow: there's nothing quite like booze to help get things moving quickly.